The World And Sirius Black According To Nellie
by SexyDoorFrames
Summary: Nellie’s life changed when Izzie had a mad moment and a quill bounced of Sirius Black’s head. A series of comical misunderstandings and situations means Nellie’s life isn’t as tasty as a plain chocolate bar anymore. No, it’s as tasty as a pack of biscuits


**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter. None of it. They all belong to JK Rowling. I simply got bored and decided to write about the characters. I do own Nellie and Izzie though.

**Words from Me:**

Hi, Welcome to my new story. This one is light hearted and In the comedy area. I thought of the idea ages ago, when I was eating a biscuit.

This is just the intro that's why it may seem a tad confusing. It is in 1st person too.

I hope you enjoy it.

Thoughts and opinions are always welcome. 

**Chapter One**  
_Quills, Biscuits And Me_

I envy Lily Evans. She has men eating out of the palm of her hand and doesn't even realize it. She's beautiful. She's nice, I haven't seen her be horrible to anybody but James Potter. Even then, she starting to be civil with him lately.

That was something I'd thought I'd never see. Then again, I live in a world full of magic. Unicorns, Pixies, It's all normal.

People could describe Lily as perfect, but I see different. I'm not her best friend or anything. Merely acquaintances, but I study people. I don't put them in a lab and run tests on them. Nothing of that sort. I just watch. Lily for example, is insecure at being a Muggleborn witch and being left behind, thus she reads a lot, and learns more. Surpasses us.

Oh, her hair is slightly large when she wakes up too.

"Nelliiieee," Izzie complained rather loudly. A few people shot us a few glares. Professor Binns didn't even notice. Too wrapped up with telling us the fascinating creatures that goblins are. Only five minutes into the class and everybody is already falling asleep.

Oh, Nellie is me by the way. Nellie O'Neill. Seventh year Gryffindor. Last year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

"Yes, Isabel?" I asked in a pompous tone, knowing that using Izzie's full name will annoy her.

"I'm bored." She stated simple as she chewed on her quill, making it go all soggy.

"Good for you," I replied before picking up my quill. Izzie had one of her mad moments, which are when she doesn't think through her actions and acts on impulse. She picked up my quill and chucked it into the class.

Unfortunately for us, It bounced right off Sirius Blacks head.

Izzie could only giggle as I sat there. My mouth resembling a fish. My eyes, wide as flying saucers. Did I mention I occasionally over exaggerate?

You see, Sirius Black, isn't your average wizard. Far from it. To chuck a quill at his head is one of the most shameful crimes. If It was anybody but the Marauders, you might have gotten away with it but my quill has just bounced of Sirius head.

Sirius Black is gorgeous. Frankly. He's part of a four piece group called the Marauders. Three fourths of them are gorgeous. The group includes, Sirius Black, James Potter, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew or as they like to be known as Padfoot, Prongs, Moony and Wormtail. Nobody knows why. I guess it's cause Sirius has really soft feet, James whiffs a bit, Remus likes the moon and Peter thinks worms have tails. It's anyone guess really.

The Marauders are superior, and the girls fawn over them. Each has their own fan club, they have it all, unnaturally too beautiful girls on their arms most of the time, the looks, the marks, and they have this essence of cool about them.

Every girl except for a handful wants a Marauder.

I myself is part of the handful. I don't want one. Not that they'd look in my direction anyway.

The four Marauders turned around, they were sitting in front of us, to see the culprit, Izzie, but instead they were looking at me. Sirius had a sharp glare. I cringed. I looked at Izzie only to find her pointing at me with her hands and mouthing 'It was her'. 

Traitor.

I elbowed her in the ribs as revenge. She deserves it.

Sirius was getting more angry as time ticked by. He looked like he was waiting for something, or at least some words from me.

I panicked. I'm not used to five sets of eyes on me. "…What?" I managed to say, It came out as a little stutter, but I was alright with that. Sirius looked livid. I didn't know Sirius was that protective of his hair. It is nice though. I wish mine didn't stick up at odd angles.

The Marauders turned around, began whispering. Sirius scribbled something on a piece of paper, then he picked up his wand, muttered something, enchanting it. It formed the shape of a bird, It began flying towards Binns. It went straight through him, Binns is a ghost you see, hell bent on making us all joining him by boring us to death. Binns looked furious. The piece of paper folded out in front of him. Binns looked like his was reading something, before his eyes trailed, and kept at me.

"Nellie O'Neill!" Binns read out to the class, they all looked at me. "Out of my class. You'll be serving detention for the rest of this week!"

Bummer.

I didn't even bother arguing back. Binns would only make it a month or something. Like he or the class would believe me anyway. They're all on their side. I think Izzie would probably go on their side for a laugh as well.

This is my first time getting sent out, and it's all because of the Marauders. Rebel aren't I? Least now, I was escaping their wrath. I counted my blessings as I picked up all my stuff that was on the table and placed it in my bag. I kicked Izzie in the shins again. I also went over to the Marauders table, picked up my Quill which was at the front of their desk now, from the floor. I glared at them, not paying attention before loosing my footing and hitting my head on the table before topping on the floor.

The whole class burst out laughing, Izzie's loud laugh could be heard over many.

I rubbed my head slightly, my cheeks felt like they were on fire before getting up. Brushing my self off, I tried to act cool as I walked towards the door slightly limping.

I might have managed it, I only tripped up once.

I closed the door behind me, I could still hear their laughter. After a couple of seconds of standing on the deserted corridor the novelty of being sent out of Binns class wore off.

It was all because of them.

Jerks.

What do people do when their sent out of the class? We'd only been about ten minutes into the two hour session. Binns had probably forgot about me now because of Goblins, so it's not like I'm going back in there.

I hummed to myself as I began counting the number of stones it takes to create a Hogwarts wall.

I'd got to three, when the door I was leaning on opened behind me. I would have fell If it wasn't for someone's strong arms catching me.

"I know I'm good looking, but I didn't expect you to fall at my feet." A cocky voice joked.

I frowned, I recognised that voice from anywhere; Sirius Black.

What was he doing here? 

Quickly regaining my composure. I leaned on the wall trying to do my cool thing again. If only I had sunglasses. "I wasn't falling for you Black. You merely opened the door that I had chose to lean upon." I answered, feeling proud.

"Yeah, yeah." He rolled his eyes.

I slid down to sit on the floor, I ached a little after the fall earlier. It's not everyday I hit my head of a table and probably bruised my leg. It only happened ever other week. 

Seconds later Sirius Black chose to sat next to me. I shuffled a little away from him. I felt uncomfortable that Sirius Black was only a elbow away. I wanted to resist the temptation of flicking him in the head.

Which is hard I tell you. Even pulling his hair would have been funny. It looked so nice… somehow I found myself reaching for it, I didn't think about anything else and before I knew it, I had tugged on his hair.

He looked at me, I looked at him. I blushed as I realized I was still holding onto his hair. I immediately let go like it was vermin, "Uh sorry." I mumbled as I apologized, I broke the eye contact and kept my eyes firmly on the floor.

"What was that for?" He asked, "Why do you keep on attacking me?" He huffed, irritated while straightening out his already perfect hair while moving a little bit away from me.

His hair was lovely and soft. I wondered what conditioner he used.

"…What?" He asked quite confused.

"Huh?" I answered. "Did I say something?"

"You started mumbling about 'soft' and 'conditioner'." He looked at me like I was an alien. Something foreign. He probably was regretting sitting next to me, thus the quite large space between us.

"Oh. I didn't mean to say that out loud." I fumbled, "I wanted to know what conditioner you used?" I can cook eggs on my face you know at the moment.

He raised his eyebrow, "I'll find out for you. I don't usually check the bottle." A moment of silence passed, before he brought the topic of conversation to the reason he got out of class, that and history of magic was boring. "Why'd you keep on attacking me? If you wanted my attention you would of only had to ask." He smirked, the famous smirk. The one which made girls melt. I can't honestly think why…I prefer smiles.

"Look!" I flustered, "The hair thing just sort of happened." I bit my lip. "Also, It was Izzie who chucked the quill? Okay?"

He was about to reply, before I cut him off "-And what was getting me sent out of class? First time you know! A week full of detention! You flipping…" I struggled to find something to replace a profanity. I was trying to limit them. Part of my 'trying to be a good person' thing I have going on. "...Fish finger!" I finally came out with.

Sirius just burst out laughing.

Sirius Black is laughing at me. 

Charming.

After a couple of minutes, he stopped and grinned at me. "I'm a fish finger?"

I didn't reply, but I folded my arms grumpily and made a little 'humph' sound. 

"It's Nellie isn't it?"

"No." I lied, grumbling.

"What it is then?" He raised his eyebrow. 

"Nellie." I mumbled.

"That's what I said." He pointed out with a confused expression on his face.

"So?" I shrugged.

"Why did you lie?"

"Because you're a fish finger." Sirius suppressed another laugh. "It's Black isn't it?"

"No. It's Sirius."

"Okay, Black."

"Stop it, You remind me of how Prongs had to call Lily by her last name for six years."

"Chipper." I answered not really listening, as I pulled out a book to read and a packet of biscuits.

"Biscuits?" He inquired, looking at the packet, inspecting it. I snatched it off him. I'm a bit protective over my biscuits.

"Yes." I replied curtly placing the biscuits on the floor. "Digestives."

"Do you usually carry biscuits around in your bag?"

"Yes." I answered truthfully. I've always had a soft spot for biscuits. "If only we had a cup of tea." I sighed, "Oh well. This will have to do." I said opening the packet. "Mum sends me some every week." I added.

Sirius looked like he was about to suggest something, but in the end decided against it.

I took a biscuit and took a bite. Sirius just looked at them. I rolled my eyes. "You can have one if you want?"

"Are they nice?" he asked as I stuffed the rest of the biscuit in my mouth.

"Yes." Came my muffled replied, as spat little biscuit crumbs everytime I spoke "Haven't you had one before?" I teased.

"I've just never had a digestive before. Okay?" He retorted before taking a biscuit and biting into it.

I giggled. It was probably because Sirius is a pureblood. He's probably used to the finer things in life than a plain digestive biscuit. He probably had ones with chocolate on them.

Fancy.

I picked up my book that I had got out earlier, before Sirius quickly snatched it off me.

Nosey fish finger.

"_How to pull that guy of your dreams_" Sirius sniggered as he read the title.

"That's not mine! I wonder where that came from." I stated in a fake shock, I was trying to pretend it wasn't mine.

He turned the page, "_This book belongs to Nellie O'Neill_ He smirked, "I wonder who that is!" Sirius turned to page number one, "_Firstly, never make a fool out of yourself._" He laughed, "You've got that point down to a charm." He winked.

I glared. "Shut up!" I said trying to snatch it back but missing. "Just give me it back!"

"No." He didn't even look up at me as he took another biscuit.

Jerk.

"_Always make sure you're wearing lip gloss._" Sirius read out. "Yuk. Don't. It's not very nice. Too sticky." Sirius carried on reading, "_Be his perfect girl._." He closed the book before tossing it in my lap. "The book is a bit useless. It's just telling you not to be yourself, be perfect, and always make sure your lips are like super glue." He finished before taking another biscuit.

"Okay Black." I answered, honestly not knowing what to say. I fiddled with my thumbs for a while. "Why you out here anyway?"

"In case you haven't noticed, Binns is boring. I said I had to go to the toilet." He stood up. "Have fun out here." His eyes glinted in the light, an aura of mischievous was surrounding him. It's very rare that it went away. The aura shielded and hid the other things that was lurking. I think Sirius liked it that way.

Sirius Black is like a parcel, he has layers.

"You too." I replied, taking another biscuit as I put my book in my bag.

"Ah wait." He bended down to pick up a couple more biscuits before walking into the classroom.

Once again, I was left alone. 

What number did I get up to earlier then? Twenty Seven? 

_…To be continued_

Next time on **The World, Biscuits And Sirius Black According To Nellie O'Neill. **

_"I visited you!" Sirius teased as he poked me in the forehead._

"Only to mock me you fish finger!" Sirius laughed

"I'm your fish finger." He teased. Sirius always makes comments like that.

"No." I replied quite confused about what he was going on. "You belong to the sea." I chewed on my nails, "Or do you belong to the fish kind?… Or the breadcrumbs?" 


End file.
